Monday, December 03, 2007

Five Months Now

Dear Darling Faith,

Today, December 3rd will mark 5 months since your birth. I often wonder what you would be like at five months old. I have stopped trying to imagine a 5 month old you with T13, but imagine if you were here with us and healthy. I would be watching you dribble baby food out of your mouth and make a mess every night at dinner. I bet you would be sleeping through the night and excercising your little heart out in a exersaucer or activity seat. But you are not here with me in body so I think what this holiday will be like without you. We have a little pink tree in the corner of the living room decorated for you. Ethan helped me put up the ornaments and helps to plug it in every night. We put up our stockings..... four in a row, and yours is a satin pink one on the end with a rose on the cuff. On Christmas we will light a special candle for you and share our memories and thoughts of you and how wonderful you are. I wonder what Christmas will be like in Heaven? I bet you will have so much fun! Playing and laughing and celebrating! I bet the lights are amazing and will top any display we have here....... not to mention you must have the tastiest hot cocoa and cookies ...... I try to imagine but I can only imagine dear one.Things are beginning to move so quickly here. Ethan still talks about you everday. He really really misses you and told me today he wished he could hold you. I told him I want to hold you too, but he can pretend and thats okay. We talk about the new baby too....... I tell him it is a gift hand picked by you. He said if its a girl we should name it Faith, but I told him that is your name only and this baby will have its own name..... maybe you could send me a suggestion in my dreams? I still long to dream of you every night as I lay down my head. I love you and miss you and long for the day that we can be together again!

Sweet Dreams!

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